Looking after Y.O.U!

How do you look after yourself?  Do you routinely put yourself first?  As number one, above anyone or anything else?  Does this to you, sound selfish?  What if I told you, that to take care of others, you must take care of yourself?  Would you believe me?  Think about it… If you let yourself go, emotionally and physically, would you be the best version of yourself?  Would this emotionally and or physically sick person be the person that YOUR loved ones deserve?  I don’t think so.  Think of yourself like a car, to function properly you must maintain it, run it, service it and fuel it with the good stuff.  What happens if you fill up a car with dirty fuel?  Enough of the crap and the car ‘gets sick’.  Just like us human beings. 

So what can you do to look after YOURSELF?  Here I go, think about my list.  These are things that you need to do to look after YOURSELF.  They are things that will help you to live a healthier and happier life.

1.     Spend time with the right people.  These are the people who love and appreciate you.  They go out of their way to look after you and encourage you to be the best person that you can be.  They embrace you unconditionally as the person you are and will support you on your journey to be the best that you can be.

2.     Stop running and face your problems.  If you are anything like myself, you have a natural tendency to run from things that scare you rather than face them head on.  You may think that these things define you as a person.  Wrong.  I have learned through many ups and downs in life that it isn’t these problems that define me.  It is the way that I have conducted myself when dealing with them and the lessons that they have taught me that define me as a person.  You choose.  Will you run?  Or is it time to be BRAVE?

3.     Make your own happiness a priority.  Your needs matter.  If you do not value, look after, and stand up for yourself, you aren’t really looking after yourself.  YOU deserve to be looked after, and YOU have the power to do this, it is your responsibility.  Remember that by looking after yourself, you can offer a better version of yourself to your loved ones.  It is possible to look after others as well as yourself at the same time.

4.     Embrace your individuality.  We are all different and that is what makes us special.  Trying to be or aspiring to be anyone else is a waste of time.   Embrace yourself for who you are.  Accept yourself.

5.     Stop.  Just for a moment every now and then.  We can get so caught up in our busy day-to-day lives that we forget to live.  Live in the present and appreciate what you have rather than focusing solely on what you do not have.  Life is for living and life is right now.  Appreciate it.

6.     Be kind to yourself.  Raise your hand if you have every said any of the following to yourself: you don’t deserve to be happy, you’re too fat/skinny/short/tall, nobody likes you, you’re a horrible person who doesn’t deserve friends, nobody loves you… the list of self sabotaging comments to oneself goes on and on but I’ll leave it there.  These mind games are not only NOT TRUE but by saying these things to yourself, you are slowly destroying yourself.  Sabotaging yourself.  Would you treat your mother like this?  No.  Your best friend? Nope, didn’t think so.  So why would you treat yourself in the same way?

7.     Be honest with yourself.  Enough with the lies, the stories… the justifications.  Get into the habit of telling yourself the truth.  However tough it may be to hear.

8.     Value the lessons your mistakes teach you.  Every mistake you make teaches you a lesson.  Focus on this rather than beating yourself up for the mistake that was made… I have turned my world upside down and become a totally new person by learning from my mistakes.

9.     Start forgiving yourself and others. We’ve all been hurt by our own decisions and/or by others. The pain of these experiences hurts but is normal, however sometimes it lingers for too long. We relive the pain over and over and have a hard time letting go. Forgiveness is the cure. It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.

10.  If you want something.  Go out and get it.  Make a plan of how you will get it, and make it happen!  Work for it.  If you don’t, you won’t achieve what ever it is that you want.  I know all too well what it is like to want something really, really badly.  You write it down super neatly in brand new markers, colour code it, illustrate it, laminate it and stick it on the wall and then cross your fingers and pray to God it will appear before you.  When it doesn’t appear you bag the whole idea and chuck it in the too hard basket claiming it just isn’t possible’… not for you anyway.  Life doesn’t work like this.  Sorry to burst any bubbles.  If you want something, YOU have to make it happen.

11.   People change.  Fact.  It sounds harsh but you cannot keep every friend you have ever made.  People move on and priorities change.  There will be people who forget about you and who you forget about.  Appreciate your friends but remember to be open to new people.  Who knows what that new girl at work could mean to you in a years time?

12.  Concentrate on the things you can control.  Not everything can always go to plan.  Sometimes things are just plain crap and you have to make the best out of a tough situation.  Look for the silver lining and control the controllable.  The rest has a way of figuring itself out.

13.  Compete against yourself and nobody else, they are not you.  They do not have the same strengths and weaknesses that you do.  Look in the mirror… that is your competition.  Aim to be a better version of yourself.

14.  Start creating your own happiness.  If you are waiting for someone else to make you happy, you’re missing out. Smile because you can. Choose happiness. Be the change you want to see in the world. Be happy with who you are now, and let your positivity inspire your journey into tomorrow. Happiness is often found when and where you decide to seek it.
15. Only YOU can control what goes into your mouth.  You decide if you are going to fuel your body with good, healthy and nutritious foods or highly processed and preserved junk foods...your call.

So this is a long and heavy list.  Reading through it sounds huge and confronting.  Too hard?  No it’s not… because YOU ARE WORTH IT.  But the answers are here (cryptically).  Only you have the answers to your life.  Choose one thing from the list and work hard at it, don’t give up.  If you fall down, just get back up.  Once you have achieved it, choose another.  Remember that nothing happens over night but looking after yourself is the most important thing because at the end of the day, only you can truly look after YOU.

YOUR life is YOUR responsibility

Liz Xox

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